עזרה באנגלית פליזז, כתבתי נכון??

My name is *****, I am fifteen years old, I live in ***** and I study in the 10th grade
My mother is called Galit and my father is called Shimon
In addition, I have two brothers, my sister Eva, aged twenty-four, and my brother Nisim, 20 years old
In my free time I love to go with my family for trips in Israel and to do tours around the world
I also like going out with companies to the mall to do shopping, eat and go out for parties and especially to spend time.